As I got home from a somewhat eventful walk with my dog Balto, I realized that my practice of letting go of things that I have no control of, or not thinking about whose fault it is or was, had worked in both our favors. We had left the house around noon, I chose that time because I have noticed that it is the least likely time to meet other dog walkers. My dog doesn’t like other dogs so meeting them on our walks means a workout for me as I hold him near his collar as he tries to show who is the alpha dog, the “Gentle Lead” allows me to hold him next to me as I plant my feet firmly on the ground for balance. That behavior is the main reason I had stopped walking him, the heavy rains didn’t help either. But as the rains abetted, and the sunshine beckoned, I found myself wanting to go on walks with him again. I walk faster when he is with me, he enjoys smelling other things than what he finds in his own yard and I enjoy spending that time with him. We do the same 50 minute loop each time. We both know which yards have dogs in, to my relief they are often empty. Those reprieves are nice. When they are there they come running and barking to the fence, Balto’s reflex is to do the same thing. As I pull him forward while telling him to be nice and to let it go he has no choice but to follow my tug. Although, I have noticed lately that he has a different attitude towards those dogs, he doesn’t bark back at them, as soon as I pull him back he gives up and follows me without a sound, if the dog doesn’t bark he behaves even better, he looks and walks on. It felt good to be walking a dog that was behaving like the majority of the dogs I have seen going by our yard..
Satisfied with Balto’s calm demeanor I praised him and myself, I assumed that walking the same way at least three times a week had caused a habit to form, with the help of the leash of course. Maybe the newness has worn away, maybe it’s no longer fun. Whatever the reason, it made me happy and gave me more confidence in my decision to walk him. As he sniffed along and I daydreamed we passed a house that was just completed. Just as we were passing by, my eye caught sight of a black labrador sitting quietly, his owners weeding nearby. At the same time that my brain was processing that information, it was also telling me with great surprise that I was falling down. I have no clear idea how it happened, but there I found myself on my right side with my left hand hanging on to the leash as the medium size dog started to run towards us, he looked very friendly. Balto, his head above mine, was anchored on the spot by my body on top of his leash. As I was trying to get up without letting go of any slack on the leash, the woman looked up. I rolled onto my bottom. My thought of “this is not good” did not have time to grow into a horror movie in my head. She reacted quickly and called her dog back. Blissfully her dog obeyed. I wondered what she thought of the situation, me on my hands and knees now and my huge dog standing like the big black wolf at the end of her driveway. What a weird scene we must have presented to her. Situation averted, I was able to concentrate on getting up, no words were exchanged between us. Balto followed me without another look at the dog. We quickly disappeared from their view.
I was pleased that I was not going to hoble for the rest of the way home. A little farther I checked my right knee, there was no hole in my yoga pants, my right hip had landed on the pavement but not hard enough to bruise. My left thumb stingged, it was bleeding a little, I must have scraped it against the pavement. I felt calm, as if the situation had not happened, I did not feel embarrassed at my fall or for Balto’s behavior which at least had been subdued. Balto has tripped me before when he unexpectedly changes direction, he has no conception of personal space or where my feet are. In his single mindedness to reach whatever goal he has set, he really doesn’t care about collateral damage to me. My brain started asking questions about what had happened. Balto must have tripped me as he turned around when he noticed the new dog. We were almost past the driveway when it had all happened, I had hoped that he had not seen the dog. As I found myself on the ground, I remember feeling calm, hanging on to the leash, looping it in my left hand and trying to get up. As we kept on walking I was relieved that my calmness had allowed me to concentrate on holding on to the leash. I decided to let go of what had just happened and to pay attention to my surroundings. I had been reminded that I should expect the unexpected when walking with my dog. I felt grateful that calm had appeared instead of fear or anger as I sat on my bottom trying to figure out how to get up and what I was going to do if the other dog reached us. I now felt stronger and full of confidence as we reached the top of the hill. Having a dog can lead to put in practice the things I have been working on mentally.
Balto has taught me to let go of the expectations or perceptions I had at how a dog owner is supposed to be like. I have let go of worrying about what other dog owners think of him or me. Having a dog like Balto has led me to let go of any judgement I had of myself and others, a lesson on humility. He has taught me the meaning of patience, which I have always had but he takes it to an all other level. I could have grown roots as I waited for him to give me back his ball so that I could throw it again. The solution, get a second ball. He will drop the one he fetched before I toss the other one, win, win. He has proven trustworthy, he doesn’t go past his invisible fence even to show other dogs who is the toughest one around. We can leave him out for the day even when we are not home. I practice mental preparedness, it can take time and cunning to outsmart a dog or deal with the many unexpected situations that come up in my life because of him.
Knowing that I can hang on to the leash when it is necessary but that I can let go of the things I can’t control has given me a new sense of strength and confidence in my abilities to deal with obstacles or problems with him or in my life. I am grateful for that.
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